A Man's Balls
Monday, November 23rd, 2009
Once, I got into an argument with Bob over women in the ministry. I had always believed that women were not inferior, but had a different role than men. That meant men could lead in the church, but women couldn’t.
I questioned that, however, and ultimately decided that was wrong. Bob and I discussed it one day, and it turned into an argument (of course!). I remember asking him what made men so uniquely qualified, especially listening to our own horrible pastor preach (Bob was the youth and music minister at that church, so we had to sit through some god-awful sermons every week) vs. a female pastor we’d seen once. “What is it about testicles that give men an ability to lead and interpret Scripture that women don’t have?” I remember exclaiming. (Within a few months, Bob did come to agree with me.) God had given me a brain, I thought, why wouldn’t he want me to use it? When Bob preached, guess who wrote half the sermon? Me. I remember he gave a sermon once that I had written entirely. Why was Bob allowed to preach, but not me? It didn’t make any sense.
Throughout the years, I heard all kinds of justifications for it.
“It’s for our protection. Men are the protectors, and women are the comforters.” ?? Sometimes.
“Women are actually the stronger sex, and that is why God designed it this way. We lead through quietness because we’re strong enough to handle it.” ??? Yeah, no comment needed.
“It’s not because we women are inferior, it’s because we are designed for different roles: separate, but equal.” ??? But if a woman can do something, she’s still not allowed. Only men are allowed to preach and interpret the Bible. According to that school of thought anyways.
And so on. Once, I even felt bad because I wasn’t particularly submissive. (This was in 2007, about 5-6 months before the end.) Guess what I was told? Because Bob didn’t really want me to submit, then I was being submissive. Yup, if you’re husband wants you to be the leader, you’re being submissive through not being submissive. Both he and my mother told me this: that I was doing what he wanted, so I was following God’s plan (yeah, in the bedroom every night! Didn’t tell my mother that part!).
The word gymnastics boggles my mind. It is amazing the number of justifications and rationalizations on this issue. Completely amazing.
Tags: Christian, Christian women, Southern Baptist, women, women in the church, women in the ministry, women's role
Loading ...
November 23rd, 2009 at 12:36 am
This always drove me crazy, too. I heard the “different roles” justification repeatedly. It never made sense to me, even when I still believed in Christianity. By the time I was 11 or 12, I knew it was wrong and it made me very angry.
November 23rd, 2009 at 12:36 am
I’ve always said these guys just need to get it over with, settle every theological argument by just whippin’ it out and gettin’ a measuring tape. Would certainly make seminary certification a much simpler and faster process without really changing the quality much lol.
November 23rd, 2009 at 12:40 am
I just spewed my water everywhere, Jemand! Haha!
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:03 am
The separate but equal one is always my favorite, because that has *always* worked out really well in history.
The other thing about a lot of those justifications is have to re-define a lot of those words, and basically make them mean something than the standard definition. Such as “equal” in separate but equal. Or “stronger” in saying that women are the stronger sex.
November 23rd, 2009 at 7:47 am
The Biblical model only works on the basis of God’s love so I am not surprised at your reaction. It appears Bob is a confused man and you were a person who inwardly wanted power thinking this would make you feel significant.
It appears Bob made another huge mistake by not giving you power in some area. Power can be satisfied in many different ways. I have found that most women want power and usually express this power through their influence in the family. However, the church has tons and tons of ministry opportunities where a woman can exercise power and control outside of her traditional role.
It sounds like you were in a church where no one was involved in ministry. As a result, you saw the only significant position as the pastoral role (this model is nearing extinction at this time). You will find collections of people who simply want a service rather than getting involved in any real ministry. It sounds like Bob and that “awful” pastor were not the inspirational types either so I am sure that didn’t help things.
The desire for power is a wonderful desire when used properly; however, the desire for power simply to have power is generally considered immoral by most Christians. With power, you are suppose to serve and that is the Christ given model.
God Bless…
November 23rd, 2009 at 9:09 am
Human males are physically stronger and more intimidating than the female. Because men naturally love control, they could in the past simply force a entire segment of the clan into submission, the women. The stories in the bible were written at a time when women were considered mere chattel, and this view is reflected in the bible unsurprisingly. This is more evidence that the bible is a product of primitive man’s imagination, for a real god would be indifferent to a creation’s genitals.
November 23rd, 2009 at 9:15 am
Jemand,
That witty comment is more profound than you think. As a guy myself, I assure you that men are inordinately insecure about that and it would quickly spell the end of religion if that were a major tenant.
November 23rd, 2009 at 12:51 pm
But Mitchell, you fail to understand the full ramifications of the fine tuning of the universe argument! To wit, the entire universe is fine tuned, not *only* to allow for human life, but specifically, the male penis! This was god’s crowning creation and as such his most important priority is to watch every penis at all times to make sure that it isn’t doing naughty things. And furthermore to make sure that all those creations *without* god’s divinely crafted human penis believe that they’re missing out on being attached to one of the fundamental purposes of reality, the fine-tuned penis.
November 23rd, 2009 at 12:53 pm
So now you’re claiming not just that RedheadedSkeptic never really did Christianity right, but that the entire congregation they worked with were not real Christians and only people looking for social services.
Hmn. Where does this end? Are you a Jehovah’s Witness?
February 27th, 2010 at 7:31 pm
The Jews of Biblical times hardly differ from the Arabs of today. They lived as the Arabs live, their society was much like the Arab society is, their patriarchal attitudes were much as the Arab attitudes are.
Who wants to live like the Arabs? Only lunatics like Al Qaeda, the Taliban and similar groups. The smart Arabs get out as soon as they can — if they can afford to.